I want anyone who reads this to take a second out of their day and tell the people in your lives how much they are appreciated.

Call your mom, your sister, your husband, your wife, whoever.  Tell them you love them.  If you’re arguing with someone, fix it.

There is nothing so bad that it can’t be fixed.

Let the people in your life know you love them.  It might be the last time you ever get to tell them that.

Make today count.

Maybe I have that.  Or maybe I have non-seperation anxiety.

I am going through one of my phases where I’m realizing just how jacked up the institutionalized church really is.  I read things about ‘church’ and I just can’t believe it.  I lose confidence in churches.  I get VERY cynical about church.  (just ask my wife or father-in-law).  I get so upset sometimes that I can’t even read something good a church does and say, “Oh. Good for them.”  I immediately jump to the negative.

My problem here lately, is I’ve been forgetting to separate the ‘church’ and God.  I keep putting Jesus in this little box.  (With a steeple, some pews, one guy talking, and several hundred listening and taking notes.)  It’s so easy for me to do.  I forget to look at the clouds and marvel in the sheer beauty.  I forget to look at the lake outside of my apartment and watch the water move.  I forget to look at the little gooslings follow their parents around in the spring.  I forget.  I forget to look inside my wife’s belly, and watch that mini-me grow.  In this magnificant time in my life, I’m too busy being pissed off to sit back and enjoy the wonderful beauty of life.

My prayer today is to remove God from the little box.  I want to allow Him in all aspects of my life.  And I want to just… apologize for putting You in that box in the first place. I want to look at all of the small wonders I see on a daily basis and be wow’d.  I want to realize how crazy it is to open this laptop up, and connect to the world.  I want to look at my pregnant wife, and be awed by the fact that she is growing a little person.  I want to open my eyes.  God. I want you to open my eyes.   That’s my prayer for today.  Help me Seperate, help me open my eyes and God, help me see.

The last three days have been mentally and physically exhausting.  Sunday night, Andrea’s grandfather went into cardiac arrest, by the time the paramedics arrived, and were able to revive him, he had been without oxygen to his brain for 10-12 minutes.

Monday, and Most of Tuesday were exhausting filled with friends, family, prayer and tears.  Around 5:20 we were all told that there was no brain activity, and there was nothing else they could do.  So again, friends and family gathered for one last goodbye.  As they pulled out the respirator, we all gathered in the room to sing Amazing Grace with Roland.  I can’t even try to type this, and my roommate, one of my mentors, and a close friend, George Lockhart has already written it so boldly.  I will just paste his encounter below.

What happened is that the last song the group was singing was Amazing Grace and during the song, they pulled the respirator and administered some morphine for any pain. Slowly the heart monitor beeped  and as Roland ebbed away, the beeps became slower and slower. But just before the final beep, as the group was singing the “praise God, praise God” segment of the song, with no brain activity for 2 days, Roland lifted his hand to join in praise of God. Moving his hand from where it lie, he raised his hand! With all the saints passed and present, he praised God. I can hear Roland say it once last time:”Amen”!

Now.  If you have never met Roland, you might not understand that.  Roland was more than just Andrea’s Grandfather.  He was my next door neighbor, my landlord, the man that shouted “Amen!” in church, and the man that stood at the door, and greeted every single person that walked threw those doors.

He was the man who told me to turn the music down, and the man who told me I needed to get the grass cut, and the man that told me, “Boy, you sure are ugly, but I’ll learn to love ya.”  Those words, resonate inside of me. He was also the man who handed me money every time I did something for him, even though I didn’t want to take it.  He was the man who would go out of his way to help but somehow, never seemed to boast about it, or even acknowledge that he had helped.  He was a man with a HUGE heart.  He was a great example of Christ. (as long as I’ve known him)

My heart hurts for the Andrea and her family.  Knowing Roland is in a perfect place, and left on such a great note helps, but the hurt is still real.  We all love Roland, and he will be missed.

To wish condolences, or to view Andrea’s account on this, you can checkout her site over at www.shalomexistence.com

In Loving Memory of Roland Underwood.
Rest in Peace.

Well, here it is.  Crucial Encounter.  What is a crucial encounter?  I believe everyone has one.  Whether you are a christian, muslim, atheist, or what.  It’s an encounter that changes you.  Forever.  I will go further into this later.  Right now, my new wonderful beautiful fiance wants to go get food.   I do too.

Feel free to subscribe and/or share a crucial encounter you had.