I have a lot to write about.  I don’t, however, have the time.

All I can say right now, is God is amazing.  The subtle lessons he teaches, along with the really tough ones. I’m the kind of guy who sometimes needs a kick in the butt to really get something.  Sometimes, I just need one thing to trigger my brain.  It feels like God has the perfect touch every time.  Now, if I could just get the picture all of the time with out the kick in the butt.

It’s a tough day, and prayers are always accepted.  Also, what can I pray for you about?
I won’t kick you in the butt. (unless it’s God’s Will. hehe)

So.  I did it.  I left this wonderful country of ours….  and I loved it.  The freedom of electronics, (I didn’t take anything with me) the freedom from America.  I have SO much to write about, and even more work to catch up on.

We went to a squatter community.  I honestly thought I had seen poor.  As a matter of fact, a week and a half ago, I thought I had been poor.  I thought that my house meant I was the lowest of the low, and I spent the majority of my elementary days feeling sorry for myself.  I thought that I had it rough, because we had to go to a store and ask for a loaf of bread.  I thought I had it rough, because neighbors were buying us clothes.

I thought I had it rough.  Quite honestly, I am a humongous ass.  I was feeling sorry for myself.  Even when we got there, I felt like a jerk.  I was walking around, looking at people, feeling like I was relating to them.  I went there thinking, “I understand what they are going through, so this will be good for me”  I have never been more wrong.

These kids were so happy with what they had.  When I was their age, I was crying because I wasn’t wearing name brands.  I don’t know what else to say but, geez.  My eyes are wide open, and I have a feeling I may not have even seen the worst of it.  I really feel like there is something more that I haven’t seen.  Something more that I can do.  Something more that needs to be done.

My fiance writes a lot about injustice, and I don’t think I ever really got it.  I still don’t think I fully do.  I think I need to pray a little more before writing more.  But there is more to come.

And some time soon, I am going to attempt to show my sense of humor.  I really really am.  I am a funny person, I promise.

More to come and hopefully it may have more final thoughts than just blabbering.  and maybe more of a story.

I am the kind of person that likes to constantly be doing something.  Whether it is working on a project, teaching someone something or just sitting somewhere and tapping my foot.  It’s a moving compulsion.  I realize this especially when I am in the soundbooth at my church.  I realized today.  Even during the pastors message, I was pacing.  When there was prayer, I was pacing.  When nothing at all was happening.  I was pacing.  I was moving the entire service.  I am always moving, or thinking.

I wonder why that is?  I like to think I have a fairly good relationship with God.  But, then times like today, I realize, I move. I move. I move.

Several times over the last week, Psalm 46:10 has come up.

Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”

It’s come up while I was reading blogs, while I was cruising the internet.  Even in just regular conversation.  People have told me to just be still at work, and most people tell me I am a very high strung person.  Why is it that I am afraid to be still?  It’s weird.

I don’t have a solution.  I don’t even have an answer.  What do you struggle with? Is it something you knew you struggled with or did it just jump at you one day like this did me?   It’s so awesome how God works isn’t it?