What have I gotten myself into?  God has really laid it on my heart lately to start writing a little about racism.  Our next president could very possible be black, and with everything else going on in the world, I suppose now is as good a time as ever. Before I get started let me go ahead and say, when I say “Black” I mean anyone with dark skin.  When (if) I say hispanic, again, it is strictly skin color.  In no way do I mean anything rude, nor am I implying what part of our world someone is from.  I don’t know what the “politically correct” way of saying things are these days, nor do I know that they are necessarily “correct”.

When I was in elementary school, our “community” was dominantly white.  In third grade, my neighborhood actually had a meeting because the “foreigners” moved into our neighborhood.  These “foreigners” had moved in a week prior and had already started a close friendship with me, which is why me, Omar and my other best friend Matt became the outcasts of the neighborhood.  To this day, that entire family cares for me, calls me, and loves me.  And Vice-Versa.

That was probably when I realized there was a problem.  Problem is, a lot of my mother’s friends had taught me some, ok, just about EVERY racist joke in the book, and I viewed them as that.  Jokes, but I have now realized, that is not all they are.  I don’t feel any hate towards black people, but I can say, I know all of the stereotypes, and learning those at an early age, scared the crap out of me.  When my friend, Omar, first wanted to be my friend, I was skeptical.  I was nervous.  And at the age of ten, I had no clue what we would have in common, I mean. I’M WHITE!  (Sadly, that is really how i viewed the situation)

The “N” word wasn’t common in my house, but I’m not going to say it was uncommon either.  I remember I never liked it, because there wasn’t something right about it, but, nonetheless, it was a word that was tossed around quite a bit in my household.

I have been susceptible to racism, and I am not proud of it.  There was a short time, I will confess, while I was around 12 years old., that I was deathly afraid of black people. (Except for Omar, because I knew him.)  I would like to say, that is around when my mom had her friends over, and they were teaching me about, whites, blacks, the rapture, and drugs.  (In one really drawn out conversation)

In high school the black population grew more and more each year, and I became close friends with all of them.  Throughout the years, God had a way of kicking me in the butt, to show me that we are all equal.  I would say that from my first day of middle school, all the way to my last day of high school, completely changed me and my views of racism.  I went from being a misled kid, to an experience young man, who saw the struggles and the hate directed at our black community.  It hurts me to this day to think about.

Looking back, I almost want to hang my head in shame.  There are times when I don’t even want to explain it, because I feel like talking about it only digs a deep hole.   God has always had a way of throwing me in the mix to teach me, because I never learn from people saying.  Do I believe that we are actually different races?  NO! As a matter of fact I can say that there is only one race I see.  That is the human race.  We have ALL been created in the image of God.  We ALL have the love of God in us, and it is ALL of our jobs to spread that love to EVERYONE.  Even our enemies.  Just as He Loved us.

I have heard arguments from a boat load of people. “Well, I got robbed at gunpoint, and the guy was black” or, “My cousin got raped, and that guy was hispanic, that is why I don’t like _________”  That doesn’t matter.  Let me explain why.

I have been held at gun point four different times.  I have been stabbed, my sisters both raped or molested, I have been jumped, and I was beat up by cops.  I have been hospitalized by people who didn’t like me.  And I have been falsely accused of a crime I DID NOT commit.  And the majority of people who did that stuff to me?  You guessed it.  White.

Of coarse, racism can go both ways, and I have seen it.  But, people.  It has to stop.   To make this world livable for our children, grandchildren and so on.  The buck stops here.  It has to end.  I want our children to not be raised seeing color, or ethnicity, but The Human Race.  People of God.  Servants of one cause.  To see the light of Love shine through each and everyone of us.

We are all children of the same wonderful, beautiful, amazing God.  It hurts him to see us hate each other. It should hurt us to be doing the hating.  What makes it right?  What is important enough to not follow God’s one commandment to us.  Love eachother as he loved us. 

I don’t know if I have gotten my point across, but let me just spell it out.  I am in no way a racist.  But Racism has affected me.  Racism has greatly made me the person I am today.  And racism is still a major issue.  I think I will write more on this, because it can go A LOT deeper than this, but for now,  I want to know.

Any comments? What have you had to do to overcome struggles with racism?  Has your community risen against a certain race?  How did that make you feel, or shape the way you thought?  Were you raised learning that a certain race was inferior?  How did you over come it?  Did you?  Can we pray for you to?

Question and comment below.  Criticize me too.  I want some good Conversation.

I inherited a lot of questionable genes and features from my mother.  If you don’t believe me take a long look at my nose.  Seriously.

One thing I am greatful for is through everything, her ability to raise me with a deep love for music.  Some of my favorite memories with her are driving in the car and singing at the top of our lungs.  My favorite is probably when we pulled over on the corner of Killian Hill and Five Forks, because “Groovy Kind of Love” came on the radio, and she needed to dance with me. (I was young, I didn’t understand the lyrics)  It’s amazing, through all of the roughness of our relationship we always had music.  And her taste was pretty awesome. (Until the Clay Aiken phenomenon)

I don’t know what I would do without music.  The good, the bad, all of it.  It really brings joy to my soul.  Last night, I was able to go with my fiance, Andrea, and see Jack Johnson.  One of my favorite musicians, and it was amazing!  There is just something about listening to good live music with the person you love, that makes all of lifes worries and stresses seem worth while.

That brings me to worship.  Because of my love for music, I learned a lot about A/V stuff.  Which is what probably made me a good candidate for the voluteer leader for our A/V team at my church.  I love it.  I absolutely love it, but sometimes, I find myself so caught up in the technical side, I find it hard to raise my hands and worship.  That, to me, is sad.  So when churches say they are going to do a “Night of Worship”, I jump all over it.  Especially if I am not asked to work the booth!

To me, worship should be all of the time.  I try to live worship.  But it is hard.  WIth work, and stress, and pains, and hurts in life, It is hard to set aside a time to just worship.  It is much easier to lose touch than I had ever thought.  I also believe there is nothing more beautiful then an entire room of people, joined in spirit, soul, and location to worship. When you add people watching from ALL OVER this World…… wow….It’s a wonderful thing.

So tonight, I will be with my fiance,  Phone off, Hands up, Heart open.

God, today, more than ever, I want You to move in me.  I ask You touch my soul and give me the refill I am so thirsty for.  Not just me, Lord, but everyone around the world who are thirsty like me.  Even the people who don’t know it, God, Just touch each and every one of us.

We are all hurting, in this world, that’s the easiest thing to do, remind us that through you ALL things are possible, and that we live, in everything we do, to bring You glory.  This is my prayer for everyone Lord.  I love You so much, and I want to show it with my strengths, weaknesses and shortcomings.  Let me be a vessel for you God.

Amen.

So, instead of trying to describe what I saw, and choosing words wisely, I’ll just publish a few of the pictures.  I think this will best relay what it was really like. These pictures are all from the squatters community.

So.  I have never left the country.  Mainly because I just have never made anywhere near enough money to even pay my rent, let alone, buy a plane ticket and a passport and just leave.

I sit and think about the gifts that God has bestowed upon me.  I mean, I have an amazingly wonderful beautiful fiance.  I have a decent enough job.  And now, I get to do something I have always wanted to.  Travel out of the country, with my best friend (See link above), and her father. Even better yet!  I get to go do work for God!  It’s amazing, but I am still nervous.  I have never flown over water, and I’m not a great swimmer.   I know that doesn’t really matter, but the scenario’s are endless.  But I digress.

I have never been on a trip like this before, so I don’t know what to expect.  I am praying that God will guide me, and move in me. 

I am not taking any form of electronic communication down there.  Just a journal, my Bible, and my copy of “Jesus For President” I will be spending a lot of time in some much needed prayer, Journaling, and The Word.  I hope to follow up with what is moved in me.  And I know there will be movement.

Please keep me in your prayers.  I really am a little nervous.

I might write one more time before I leave….. So.. be looking

Adios.